Wednesday, July 15, 2009

how do i let you go?

I hoped that the night would never end . .

Time just froze up to eternity

But it dint . .

I was told be strong

Not to think too much

And I did all that

But I was wrong.

How did I let myself be so vulnerable?

How did I loose myself?

How do I face myself now?

How do I face this world?

How do I get rid of you?

How do I remove the scars?

How do I feel loved?

How do I heal?

Where do I put all the anger?

How do I clear my soul?

How do I keep myself alive?

When I am already dead?

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Guys . . Is my diet working?

My week has been horrible. Health is still problematic, but much much better. Emotionally I am wrecked because sometimes accepting reality can be hard on you. But again it leaves you peaceful. When you just decide to move on, you let go of the baggage and are ready to fly.

All that’s good in mah life now is work and me. I am insanely experimenting and trying to figure out what’s good and bad for me. I know my diet is kind a helping me, but I gotta try harder.

It’s a na├»ve attempt to ask but the ulterior motive being to flaunt. Thought these pictures look fairly descent. Kindly feel free to flatter me. I will be much obliged.

Love you all.

Thursday, July 2, 2009

Black and White

I am down with severe fever since two days. manged to work a little but had to give up and sleep at home. Fevers tend to make you nostalgic. You think of all the good things about your past. You sleep and sleep and sleep. Its a good reason to take a break. its like u r in a black and whit film.

but feveres are more interesting when you have someone to take care of you. or when you have some one to show concern. you feel like the whole world is caring for you. but when u have no one to care for you, u miss it badly.

I just realised in these two days of being bed ridden that, I truly donot have any friends circle right now. I have friends from work and other friends, but they are all far away and busy with their life. The all care, but are not here! now! and I seriously think i need a new friends circle immediately. My new mission as soon as I am back on my foot!!!

i watched lots of TV and films . . . and saw some amazing stuff lying down and resting. Some lines just keep lingering in my ear . . .

the line from Brothers and sisters, a TV show where the Daughter Katie is talking to her mom, who has just told every body that she knew her husband had an affair with another woman for past 15 years .. .

MOM: i alwaus new. .. . but he promised that it would stop . . and he later went on to buy her a house . . .

KAT: But he loved you mom . . .

MOM: he kept betraying me . .and i let him do it . . i dont know why . .

KAT: because he loved you . .

MOM: ya he loved me . . and he did not have to give uo anything to love me . . so whats the big deal?????

woaaaawwwww - what a line? people love you . . great . . . .but if they dont have to give up anything to love you . then whats the big deal???? how special are we? we actually dont matter . ..

Another line is from this Musical called RENT -

525,600 minutes, 525,000 moments so dear. 525,600 minutes - how do you measure,
measure a year?

In daylights? in sunsets? in midnights? in cups of coffee?

In inches? in miles? in laughter? in strife?

In 525,600 minutes - how do you measure a year in the life?

How about love? How about love? How about love?

Measure in love. Seasons of love.